With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize