Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Do you remember whose house we're in?
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize