i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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