Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
