Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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