? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
