There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
