new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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