C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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