he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
