Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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