Jerry, you need to find god
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
