Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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