this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
