I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize