Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
