i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.