Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm that good.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time. (970): I'm that good. http://tfl.nu/qp5j
  Replies (5) Good night (4182) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober http://tfl.nu/te1z
  Replies (29) Good night (3464) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall http://tfl.nu/brex
  Replies (11) Good night (4348) Bad night (917)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (856): When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one" http://tfl.nu/6em2
  Replies (11) Good night (2867) Bad night (1201)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos. http://tfl.nu/dg53
  Replies (10) Good night (3303) Bad night (1377)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer. http://tfl.nu/hmny
  Replies (5) Good night (1029) Bad night (3190)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised? (860): Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time http://tfl.nu/9nef
  Replies (2) Good night (2268) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities. http://tfl.nu/947a
  Replies (12) Good night (2394) Bad night (627)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL. http://tfl.nu/sk5h
  Replies (21) Good night (1733) Bad night (705)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will. http://tfl.nu/oylu
  Replies (9) Good night (1153) Bad night (409)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city. http://tfl.nu/xrle
  Replies (12) Good night (478) Bad night (1242)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus. http://tfl.nu/cdmo
  Replies (6) Good night (598) Bad night (769)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw. http://tfl.nu/4mnb
  Replies (9) Good night (1093) Bad night (409)
• Favorite

  (646): View more from New York

  I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (646): I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes... http://tfl.nu/1uwm
  Replies (9) Good night (375) Bad night (1294)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (320): I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING http://tfl.nu/fcp6
  Replies (12) Good night (1598) Bad night (294)

Randomize