I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize