Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I forgot how hot balto sounded
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
