I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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