it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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