I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize