The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Are my feet made of real feet?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
we're so committed to being not committed
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
