2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
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