Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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