Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
