I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
