Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
