I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize