He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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