I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize