Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
