how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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