If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize