Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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