I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
