even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
