he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
