For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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