i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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