yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
do herpes really smell.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
