He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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