apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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