i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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