I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
