you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I have aggressive nipples.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
