I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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