im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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