Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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