Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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