i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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